Live and Let Live

I'm really struggling with my emotions lately. I'm trying to think about my future in a way that doesn't impose on my life right now. I think thoughts of the future trigger some sort of emotional switch. I really want to make the right decision. I'm trying very hard to remain rational, but I find myself becoming erratic when thinking about this. 

There are things I cannot stop from happening. Live and let live - I'm trying. I'm struggling and I don't know what to do. The thing that makes me the happiest is also the one thing that hurts to think about. I'm struggling to live and let live, but I'm trying.